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Funny Friday

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Funny Friday

Ten Thoughts to Ponder Number 10 – Life is sexually transmitted. Number 9 – Good health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die. Number 8 – Men have two emotions: hungry and horny. If you see him without an erection, make him a sandwich! Number 7 – Give a person a fish and you feed them for a day; teach a…

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Funny Friday

My grandfather always said, “Don’t watch your money; watch your health.” So one day while I was watching my health, someone stole all my money. It was my grandfather. – Jackie Mason My Dad Is Better Than Your Dad Three boys are in the school yard bragging about their fathers. The first boy says, “My Dad scribbles a few words on a piece of paper,…

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Funny Friday!

Only from Rodney Dangerfield: A girl phoned me and said, ‘Come on over. There’s nobody home.’ I went over. Nobody was home! Last night my wife met me at the front door. She was wearing a sexy negligee. The only trouble was, she was coming home. My wife likes to talk on the phone during sex; she called me from Chicago last night. A man…

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Funny Friday

The arthritis cure Doctor Bloom, who was known for miraculous cures for arthritis, had a waiting room full of people when a little old lady, completely bent over in half, shuffled in slowly, leaning on her cane. When her turn came, she went into the doctor’s office, and, amazingly, emerged within half an hour walking completely erect with her head held high. A woman in the waiting room who…

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Funny Friday!

How to deal with women – as if I know anything. However I was looking at some words of wisdom and found a few quotes that I wish I had learned when I was younger. For example: “Don’t tell a woman she’s pretty; tell her there’s no other woman like her, and all roads will open to you.” – Jules Renard That’s an incredibly wise saying. People…

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Funny Friday

Bill Maher ends his show with a rant about Big Pharma, astutely observing, “If you believe you need all the pills and drugs the pharmaceutical industry says you do — then you’re already on drugs.” Watch this “YouTube” video clip.http://www.youtube.com/v/rHXXTCc-IVg&rel=1 How Congress “Works” http://www.funnyordie.com/videos/26b0d09397 A TEST FOR OLD KIDS The answers are printed below, but don’t cheat. 1. After the Lone Ranger saved the day…

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