There’s no business like show business but there are several businesses like accounting. – David Letterman
Beware of all enterprises that require new clothes. – Henry David Thoreau
You can fool all the people all the time if the advertising is right and the budget is big enough. – Joseph E. Levine
A financier is a pawnbroker with imagination. – Arthus Wing Pinero.
If all economists were laid end to end, they would not reach a conclusion. – George Bernard Shaw
A verbal contract isn’t worth the paper it’s written on. – Samuel Goldwyn
Two cannibals are eating a clown. One says to the other “Does this taste funny to you?”
A blind man walks into a shop with a guide dog. He picks the dog up and starts swinging it around his head. A shop assistant calls out: “Can I help, sir?”
“No thanks,” “I’m just looking.”
An old man goes to a wizard to ask him if he can remove a curse he has been living with for the last 40 years. The wizard says “Maybe, but you will have to tell me the exact words that were used to put the curse on you.” The old man says without hesitation, “I now pronounce you man and wife.”
John was on his deathbed and gasped pitifully. “Give me one last request,” he said. “Of course, John,” his wife said softly.
“Six months after I die,” he said, “I want you to marry Bob.”
“But I thought you hated Bob,” she said.
With his last breath John said, “I do!”
Note – OK, I have to admit my wife really didn’t like the last two jokes:)
Improving on my KST and loving every bit of it.
Here’s a joke I made up a told a friend who entered it in a contest and won second prize: How did Bob Hope live such a long life? The reason
was Jesse Jackson who kept repeating the phrase “Keep hope alive”.
Keep up the Great work! I always enjoy the humor and the quotes. By the way, KST rules.
Without a doubt,in the very near future, KST will prove to be one of the most beneficial diagnostic tools MANKIND will have.
Ken Mullins, D.C.
Don’t Prejudice Others
You have to advise a woman(pregnant for the 9th time)whether to terminate. She already has given birth to 3 deaf children, 2 blind children and 1 mentally retarded child. She has suffered 2 stillbirhs and currently has syphilis. It would probably prove difficult to get excited about prospects for the unborn child and yet that child turned out to be Beethoven!
I love your jokes Tedd. Laughter is such a huge part of being healthy. We all need to laugh more.
Always enjoy your jokes!
Thanks for the laugh Tedd.
I like reading your jokes
A boy asked his mother why wedding dresses are white.
She replied ” Son that is to show your friends and relatives that the bride is pure”.
The boy thanked his mother for the explanation and went off to double check this information with his father.
“Dad why are wedding dresses white?” he asked
The father looked at his son with some surprise. “Son” he said ” all household appliances come in white.”
Tanja supplied that one!
Growing old is a bad habit for which a busy person has no time!
Keep the humour coming… improve your jokes…… get some new ones……..only kidding……..you are doing a great job… keep up the good work …. See you in Abingdon… James
Better than dress down Friday. Humor is one of the best medicines.
Thanks for the laugh Tedd. Keep them coming.
I had a new patient in my waiting area who was invisible. I told him I could not see him right now!
when people ask me whats its like going to a KST seminar i always tell them its like spending 2 days with Billy Crystal. you certainly are a multifacited dude.
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